Best Friends, High School and the Shaven Monkeys

Tonight I said goodbye to my best friend. A friend I’ve known since Standard 3 or 4, I forget… Not just a “Goodbye, catch you laters”, nope, a “Goodbye, I’ll see you, hopefully, in a few years…” Yeah. I’m sure we’ll keep in contact, and I’m sure we’ll see each other again, and he knows that (if I ever) have a son, he’ll have his name. This doesn’t take away from that impact though.

So to honour of the past years of friendship, I have a story of two slightly crazy teenagers, with not enough angst and too much zest for life. It all started due to the “privilege” that Matrics’ get. Low and behold, in your 12th year of school, you are allowed to stay in your classroom during breaks, allowing the use of a kettle and toaster, and our greatest prize – the blackboard! Now Lynton is an artist. Hell, he’s the best I have ever seen. And being an artist, you see life differently. I suppose that’s how we came up with the idea of spunky. Our reasoning was something like

Spice Ham equals Spam, therefore, Spiced Monkey must equal Spunky!

It was pure genius! It all made sense! How could no-one have seen this before? Surely we weren’t that gifted, but alas, it seems we were… Once the initial idea was there, we started to flesh it out if you would. Naturally monkeys are the last viable untapped resource on this planet, therefore we should eat them! How would we do this? On a stick of course! So monkee-on-a-stick was born, but we didn’t stop there dudes. We thought about this more and came up with another theory : monkeys would taste better if shaven (aka hairless). Not so much a theory as applying logic to the thought process we already dreamed up. but then came the greatest improvement of all. Our crowning moment if you would. A theory with the equation that would make people look at us funny, but who cares right! Life is about having fun, and we did! This equation is amazing in that it lead us to the greatest imagining yet. I bet you are dying to hear about it, or for me to get to it hey? Well wait no longer!

The Equation:

The trajectory of a shaven monkee to the power of pie (steak pie to be exact) = mmm… tasty!

Could it be? Could this be the solution to the worlds problems? Could this hold amazingness? Oh all this and more, but (and here’s another twist), when put into practice with a live monkee, it created an elite soldier monkee, under our control. Immediately we saw the benefits of this. An elite fighting force of monkees! We were unstoppable! And so on that fateful day back in 2003, in a classroom on the top floor of Carter High School, we created our greatest work yet.

The next year rolled around, and I went for a gap year in England, Lynt stayed in PMB. When I got back, Lynt moved to Cape Town, and we have hung out together almost every holiday. I had the honour of attending his wedding in August this year (2010). And now tonight, I have said farewell. I am moving overseas, and I honestly have no idea when I’ll see him again. Lynt, I hope all goes well with you. You are my brother and my best friend.

PS: I don’t think I have to add, but it might be for the best, all this was our imaginings. We did not ever shave and monkeys or make them fight. In fact we never even touched one, as I believe I would scream like a little girl if one got close. So relax, no monkees were harmed in real life. In our imagination, now that’s a different story.